Leave Your Sanity With the Nearest Customs Agent

09/24/2006

It's not the first time I thought you were crazy but you really are, aren't you?*

I am still here, plugging away at work and all that good stuff. I definitely have gone a little crazy, let me tell you. As if I don't have enough on my plate, I decided to start applying to grad schools in the UK as well as ones in the US. Applying to schools in the UK as an international is a lot of work. I have transcripts to have sent, copies of my degree and teaching certificate to send off, GRE and teaching exam scores to order as well. And not only that, if I do get into a grad school in the UK, I have to find the money to pay for it. So even more work for me to do. The insanity just keeps on coming.

I have been knitting, but I keep forgetting to take pictures before I send them off. I do have a picture of the package for my nephew, but I haven't heard if it has been received yet. And I am not spoiling the surprise. I am knitting though. I have a hat started for me, the shawl is still being worked on, Dad's gloves are waiting for me to get off my butt to do the math, and I have a sweater to get started. Haven't gotten the design for it yet from a certain guy, so I am going to change the design and plan. 

So a week ago Friday, the insanity got to me. I don't have the money for new ink as I am saving money right now. Instead I got four new piercings. I got a small stud in my nose, a cartilage piercing, a tragus piercing with a stud and not a hoop, and my belly button done. I have had my belly button pierced before, but had to take it out. This time, I got it done with a barbell instead of a ring. I thought that would make a difference. But yesterday, it didn't look too healthy, so I went to the doctors. He said that it is probably a reaction to the metal and not a bad piercing or improper care. I have to be careful what kind of metal jewelry I wear anyway or I get an itchy, red rash. The doctor checked my other three piercings and they are healing just fine. So I just have to accept the fact that I will never be able to have my belly button pierced. Sad in a way but at least I know the reason behind it. 

Next time, I will have pictures, I promise. And in a few weeks, I will have pictures from Cambodia. Yeah for mini-vacations!!!

*The quote is a line from a recent email from a friend of mine as I told her about my plans for the future      

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09/11/2006

Pictureless quickie

I planned to update on Sunday, but blogspirit wasn't cooperating at all. Then last night, I was busy knitting on the scarf I am making for the International Scarf Exchange. I am already about 1/3 of the way finished. Now, I am updating from work-bad, bad employee. But this way interested parties will know I haven’t fallen off the face of the Earth. I am finalizing the package for my Second Sock Swap pal as well. I have the sock finished, the yarn ready to go, and the little extras already as well. I just have to pack everything together and get to the post office. I mailed two more boxes of stuff back yesterday and I have one more box to mail this week. We are into our second full week at work now. I only have 18 students so far, but the other 2 will be showing up shortly. Compared to my last two classes here, this class is relatively calm for a bunch of 5 and 6 year olds. At the same time, I have a class of very mixed ability. So I will have a lot of work to get them ready for grade one. This year I am going to try reading and writing groups because my class is so mixed. Little ones have arrived and expect a teacher today. Thank goodness today is swimming class day and I don’t really have much to teach this morning. I will do my best to post more with pictures this evening at home. That is after I go to the post office to mail the latest box off.

 

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06/29/2006

T minus 36 hours and counting

I can't believe that in 36 hours I will be on a plane heading to Thailand for two weeks and will be with my sister. I haven't even really started packing. I have some stuff set aside to be put in my suitcase, but nothing is actually in my suitcase yet. I really should work on that today instead of waiting until 2 hours before I have to leave and forgetting half the stuff I need to bring and bringing half a suitcase full of worthless junk. I am getting better, but even after all the traveling I have done, I always forget one thing. I know the places we are staying in Thailand have internet acces, so I will try to post some while there.

Meanwhile, I have been knitting. To start off with, I have one Jaywalker sock completed and the second one started. These pictures were taken earlier this week, so I have more knitted on the second sock. I also finished my Dream Swatch scarf (from the Knit-n-Tonic blog) out of the last of the Hand Knit Cotton for Mia. Please don't ask me to put in links tonight. I really should be packing so I am not stressing out over this whole getting ready for vacation thing. I will wait until after Thailand to post pictures of my Bettie vest. I think that it would be best to have some action shots of it.

The last week of school has been not bad. Here is a kid free picture of an exploding volcano from Tuesday.  And here is a picture of what my classroom has been reduced too minus some books, personal teaching resources, puppet stage, and finger puppets. The books and teaching resources I brought home for safe keeping.

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06/13/2006

One more down

Way back at the beginning of the year, I typed up a list of things to do, and maybe within this year. I have two things to knock off the list. Studying for the GRE and actually taking the GRE. Saturday morning I took the second half of that big test thing I need to get into the master's program I want. I took the essays back in March and Saturday was the math and verbal sections. I was really worried about Saturday morning, especially after studying the prep book I bought. The test wasn't anywhere near as hard as I expected. There were some vocabulary that I didn't recognize and some geometry that I haven't used since 10th grade. Something about lines tangent to two circles and figuring out the area of them. Not something I use a lot. In about 6 weeks I will have my scores and then it will be time to start applying to grad schools.

 I have actually been knitting as well. Here is the back and one half of a side of my Bettie sweater. I work on it while traveling to and from work each day. I used some of the Rowan cotton I have to make a Isabeau purse. It is still waiting to be blocked, what is new here though? Not sure what I am going to do with it yet, meaning will I keep it or give it away. Now I was planning on knitting a lace stole using the Trellis Scarf pattern from IK. But I started it and decided that it wouldn't work. One reason being that with work being as busy as it is, I can't focus enough to make sure the pattern comes out right. The other reason being that the pattern does not lend itself to the colors in the yarn. So I found a much simpler pattern on the web and have started it. It is easier to knit, I can knit it while watching TV even. And the colors of the yarn are able to show through. Even with the little bit I have done, I can really tell a difference. The only other silk yarn I have worked with is some Noro Silk Garden. This yarn from Jan is so soft, I just love the way it feels running through my fingers as I knit. Going to try and sneak a row or two in tonight.

And before I forget, here is the picture of the birthday stuff from Mia, sans the candy. Love the monkeys. (Actually thinking that I need to knit myself another monkey. Lisa gave me a bunch of yarn and I am thinking that is what I will make.)

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05/22/2006

Updates........

Got an email from Davi today and Rhi is going to have to be on bed rest for the next 14 weeks. Which is going to be really hard for Rhi, but I know she can do it. Went to see the Pimp tonight and he is feeling a little better. He at least looks more like his normal self tonight than he did last week or even last night. Tomorrow he finds out exactly what is going on and the doctors will have a better idea of what to do. Thank you all for the good thoughts and wishes. They are working so keep them coming.

Well, made it to Ilan just fine on Saturday after getting the ticket thing straightened out. Actually had to call one of my roommates to tell the lady at the train station to just give me the ticket, that I didn't need a seat. I got to Ilan about 1pm on Saturday. So that afternoon we went to the Ilan winery museum, the old Ilan city office building, and the Museum of Traditional Arts. The old city office is actually a Japanese house. Before KMT took over Taiwan (which was during the Cultural Revolution in China) Taiwan was occupied by Japan. So there are plenty of remnants of the Japanese occupation included houses. It had bamboo mat floors, sliding doors, garden, and plenty of other traditional Japanese elements. It was nice, just wish I had more time to look around.

Feeling rather blah and down in the mouth right now because of everything that is going on. So more on Ilan and more about knitting as life and work take a break. Actually feeling kind of homesick right now because I feel like I should be there for Davi and Rhi and instead I am here in Taiwan. As much as I love traveling and living overseas, it is moments like this when I wish I didn't have this particular addiction. (Traveling really is an addiction, an expensive one at that too. But I love it and can't believe how much is out there to see) Because of all of this, I have probably spent and excessive amount of time at the hospital with the Pimp. He is the only person I can check up on and it gives me some sense of control over uncontrollable situations.  Even if it is a false sense of control and makes me feel like I am helping out.

What I don't think the Pimp understands is what a loop he has thrown my life for. I wasn't planning or even really wanting to have these feelings for someone while I was in Taiwan. Was going to wait to start with the whole relationship/dating thing until I get back to the States. But here he is and I have all these feelings and I am not sure what to do with them. A little background about when I lived in Scotland. There was this guy that was one of my house mates in Edinburgh. My feeling for him are as strong as my feeling for the Pimp. The difference is that I never told this guy how I felt because I thought that keeping him as my friend was better than telling him the truth and possibly losing him from my life forever. So this time around, I am trying to make a different set of mistakes, one of the main reason I told the Pimp how I feel about him. But I don't think he completely gets how strong my feelings are. Which is partly my fault because I have problems communicating effectively. And half the time I am not even sure how to read the Pimp or what to do or even what to say. At a complete loss, really. Like the past two nights. Last night we just talked and talked and he even walked me to the subway station. Today, another co-worker showed up and I felt like I was put on the back burner. Granted the Pimp and this co-worker have done plays and other stuff together, so obviously they know each other better. I just need to listen to my brain more and the rest of me less. At least attempting to type this all out has helped me to feel better.

09:51 Posted in Family , Friends , Life in Taiwan , me, me, and me | Permalink | Comments (2) | Email this

05/21/2006

Requests, request....

So this weekend, two of the roommates and I went to Ilan for the weekend. I will post about that later, along with some knitting content, because this is, a knitting blog. So what is a knitting blog without knitting. And I so need to catch up on comments. Like Anne, Amanda, Sandie, Elizabeth, Mia, Jan, and Latoya. Really, promise, pinkie swear that I will leave comments by the end of the week. I have been really slacking, I know. I think I can blame work for this.

The real reason for this post. My best friend (Davi) and her sister (Rhi) are both pregnant and due three weeks apart. Davi's pregnancy is going great and everything is good with her and baby Brandon. Rhi is having difficulty and went in the hospital having contractions at 25.5 weeks. The doctors were able to stop the contractions and are giving Rhi steroids to help baby Kirstin's lungs to grow. And the Pimp is in the hospital here in Taiwan. He is going to have stay at least a week. He has been sick for 6 months and the doctors haven't been able to find the right antibiotic to give him to help him feel better. So Rhi, baby Kirstin, and the Pimp all need the good, positive, feel better thoughts you have. What ever it is you do; pray, dance, sing, you name it, they all need some right now. Baby Kirstin needs to stay in mommy as long as possible and the Pimp needs to get better. Did go to the hospital tonight and took the Pimp some food. Talk about a well-trained whore, right here bay-bee.

The trip to Ilan was a trip within its self. I should have know that it would be off to an interesting start when I went to buy my train ticket and the lady wouldn't sell me one because there were no seats available on the train I wanted. But it is normal to sell tickets even when there are no seats available. I have done it before. Ilan is only 1.5 hours from here on the express train. I had to call Lydia to translate that I just wanted a ticket, not a seat. More of the travel saga in a day or two. Going to see the Pimp again tomorrow at the hospital.

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04/30/2006

Peter and Jane go up and down*

But it has mostly been ups. Friday evening, I meet Anne and we went yarn shopping. The yarn store in Shilin was closed though!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you believe it?!?!?!?!?!? I can't either. But it will reopen on May 6th, so I will be able to get the yarn I need for Brandon Scott's knitting. But I did not come home empty handed. We went to two yarn stores near Taipei Main Station. At the first one, I got striped yarn to make Jaywalker socks. And I found some RYC Cashsoft Aran. I am going to use the blue to make a hat for my yoga instructor who will be moving back to Canada in about 8 weeks. She has taught me so much and most of it on her own free time. A soft, handmade hat is the least I can do for her. The tan is for a hat and scarf set for my fabulous co-teacher. She is just amazing and I am so lucky to work with her this year. I am still searching for patterns for these hats and the scarf, but I am really looking forward to knitting with this yarn. As with all knitters I have talked to, meet, and emailed, Anne is super cool and brought me chocolate! Talk about an awesome person.

And there are F.O. as well. I finished the Mock Smock socks yesterday. They need to be blocked before they are gifted. And I am finished with the Cozy scarf/headband using some of the yarn Jan sent me. This isn't a great picture because it is still drying from where I am blocking the pattern open. But I can't wait until it is dry and I can use it.

Today I had to go see my psychiatrist to get my Prozac refill. (He is lowering my dosage in order to get me off, but the full explanation to follow) While waiting, I started working on the Rowan pattern that Mia sent me for Secret Pal 7. Can you guess how long I had to wait to see the psychiatrist by how much I finished?

 

 

 

It took me about 3 hours to knit this much. I don't know if I should be proud or embarrassed by the speed of my knitting. That is about 3 inches finished.

Friday, the Pimp gave me a ride to the subway so I could meet Anne. It was raining and we were both wearing full face helmets, so it was difficult to talk. So when he dropped me off, I asked him if I could just call him this weekend. I called him Saturday night, there was no answer, so I actually left a message. Here it is Sunday and he still hasn't called back. I am a little upset about it, but after having lunch with another co-worker today, I feel better. I am just going to take many steps back and go back to crushing from afar. But when I saw my psychiatrist today he asked me how I was doing and I told him about the Pimp and him not calling be back. Then M.D. asked me if I was binging or anything and I said no. I told him that is was frustrating and I am a little disappointed, but it will be ok. I told him I was feeling better after having lunch with someone I was able to talk about it with. So that is part of the reason he is reducing my Prozac. Which is nice. But I am still feeling a little upset by the whole Pimp thing. The real test will be tomorrow when I have to go to work. But it is pretty easy to not have to see or talk with someone on in the same department.

*The reading series we use at work is the Ladybird Key Word Series and we just finished one of the books in class. There was one whole page of Peter and Jane going up and down on the see-saw.

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04/26/2006

It's all good

The stash knitting has been going quite well, let me tell you. There is getting to be less and less yarn in my stash. I did cheat though. This, full of yarn and material scraps, went to one of my sisters. The needles are there are scale purposes. And I took some scraps to my class so my fiber loving kids have some as well. But this is progress so far. There is this belt/scarf that I made using some of the amazing Rowan cotton yarn Mia sent me. I use the scrunchable scarf pattern for this as well. Love the texture this pattern produces. Also I have been working on the Mock Smock socks, Sandie sent me the pattern. I predict I will be finished with them by this weekend. There is only about 3/4 inch left on the foot to knit before I start the toe decreases. (Boy, do I sound like I know what I am doing or what? Don't let that fool you at all people) And I am knitting up some of the yarn Jan sent to me. I am knitting up a scarf/headband thing using the Cozy pattern. Since I have a grand total of 19 stitches, so there isn't all the bad words like when I knit the full size version. And check out the colors in the yarn. This is what I love the most, the way the colors change while knitting. It is like the grown-up mature version of self-striping yarn. Let's see if I can get a decent close up of some of the colors. Using some of the other yarn, I am knitting up a panta for myself. I don't like hats, but if I am going to keep my hair short, I will need something to keep my ears warm. And since I have this fabulous yarn, I am taking advantage of it. I found the pattern on craftsters.org/forum, but the site isn't working right now. And when it does, again, I will try and remember to put the link in. Once again, I just love the colors in the yarn. Thank you so much Jan. And finally, here is the monkey (Who is still nameless. How truly sad) with his scarf made from leftover sock yarn. He looks very happy, doesn't he?

I do have some amusing stuff from work. I have a group of very smart kids who have a rather dense teacher. So when we were on the roof writing with chalk, I didn't pay much attention to what I was being asked to spell by everyone. This showed up in several locations on the roof. Thankfully it has rained for several days now, so it is all pretty well washed off. But my kids thought they were the coolest things ever after they did this.

The fact that I am a teacher and even more so that I teach 6 year olds amazes me quite often. I have no patience what so ever. My patience is long enough to last from the time I walk in my classroom until I leave. Sometimes it isn't even that long. I love my job, I love being a teacher, and I love my kids. But patience is something I have to work on, my kids are teaching me a lot about it as well. This lack of patience thing extends into every aspect of my life. Right now I am in a "Boys are stupid" mood even though this has nothing to do with a certain one and everything to do with me. The Pimp's play was last Friday. He told me that he wants this week to just relax, recover, and sleep. So that next week there is a better chance of us going out. I emailed him last week about several things and I am trying to be patient and wait for him to get back to me. Truly I am, but it is starting to grate on my nerves that I haven't heard back from him. Patience is important I keep telling myself. But he is giving me a ride to the subway on Friday because I am meeting up with Anne and we are going on a yarn crawl!!! So something good for the end of my week. Which has been insane, between the additional DVD shooting and the Open House, this week has been busy. But hopefully on the ride down from work there can be more than a Hi!, How are you doing? 30 second conversation. What can I say. Got to get off of here. I have to do yoga tonight, call the teacher certification people in West Virginia, and get to bed so I am already for parents tomorrow. Let the circus begin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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04/20/2006

Absolutely Fabulous Part 3

There aren't any pictures for this post. It is a more a reflection on myself and my trip. It has been a long time since I have even s out of Taipei. In Jan. of 2005 I flew to London to meet up with my best friend and my dad. That is the last time I was out of Taipei, very sad I know. Even worse for me because I love to travel and explore the world. Spending a day hiking around a gorge is a great way for me to relax, unwind, and kind of re-center myself. A break for the soul as someone said. At the height of my depression, I didn't want to make the effort to talk to anyone I wasn't already close too. And even then it took great effort. I felt like I was just saying the same thing over and over again and who wants to hear that. On top of that, I felt like no one would find me interesting or could even be capable of liking me. I know that is not the truth now and I am starting to feel better. During this break, I spent an hour talking to a girl from Virginia who was staying at the same hostel. I talked to some Taiwanese people on the tour bus as well. Things that 6 months ago I wouldn't have been able to do. I did still do the wander on my own thing. I will always need to fulfill the needs of the introvert in me. But I am getting better and coming out of my shell. It feels good as well.

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04/03/2006

Will you really or just promising?

Just a warning, this is going to be rather boring because I am not at home and have no way to put pictures in. This weekend was good and boring at the same time for me. During the major depression phase, I just keep putting off little things I needed to get done because I "didn't feel like it" or "don't have the energy." So now I have 6 months worth of activities and projects to take care of. I finally have the energy and desire to do all of these little things. Such as clean my room every week, do the math on some knitting projects (really Dad, I am working on your gloves), and fixing all the jewelry my kids have broken. So got lots of that stuff done while sitting in front of the TV with my leg up. My knee is feeling a lot better now. My kids can actually hug me today and I can pick them up again. Thanks for all the good wishes.

Friday evening more than made up for my boring weekend though. Friday in class we watched a movie. I finished reading "The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe" to my class. The deal was after I finished reading it to them, we could watch the movie. So I got the BBC version on DVD and we watched that, all day. So I got to sit most of the day and rest my knee. After a pretty relaxing day, I didn't want to sit on the school bus with the junior high kids. So I sent a note to the Pimp asking him for a ride to the nearest subway station. If I can get a ride down, then I can get home at least an hour earlier than if I take the school bus. Well, he came up and said he was going for pizza and would I like to join him. Duh! Sometimes I think he is denser than I am and that is just sad folks, I have no life, not like I haev a busy schedule to work around.  There was great pizza, great conversation and wine involved. The Pimp likes to eat and knows all these great places to go. And the conversations with him are really good to. It is just nice to talk to someone who isn't Taiwanese. I like my Taiwanese friends, but I am just not Taiwanese and some of my views make me look like a circus freak to them.

Bonus to a boring weekend at home, Wednesday is Tomb Sweeping Day, a national holiday here. So I get a day off in the middle of the week!!! Excitment!!! If the weather is nice, I a going to head to Da-an park to sit and knit in the sun. Then maybe I will go and see a movie. I want to see Match Point and V for Vendetta. Pimp wants to see V for Vendetta as well, but he is the one with the busy schedule. So maybe I will just go by myself. (The Pimp keeps promising that one day he will read my blog, but nothing as of yet. At least as far as I know. But he keeps promising me, really)  I am getting impatient waiting and want to see these movies while they are still in theatres. I would love to go see a movie with the Pimp, but I am impatient and trying not be obsesive about this whole thing. There are times when I have a tendency to act like a 14 year old around the Pimp.

Ok, have to get ready for this afternoon, must make copies. Little ones expect something fun today.  

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03/30/2006

So freaking bored

It all started Tuesday at around 3:20 in the afternoon. I took my kids to the elementary playground because they had been good and I needed to get some energy out of them. At the elementary playground, there is a rock climbing wall. Kids love it. So I was playing with them and climbing on the wall. I can get pretty high because I am taller than them. I was jumping down and a kid ran in my way. So I twisted to keep from landing on the kid and twisted my ankle and jammed my knee. It didn't really hurt until about 8pm Tuesday night. I went to bed and laid there thinking, "I am never moving again." I put heat on it last night and went to work today. Can't face dealing with a limited English ability doctor right now. Especially after having to see the psychiatrist on Sunday. So I have heat on it again tonight and a brace for tomorrow. My ankle doesn't hurt, just my knee. It is a little swollen and hurts walking up and down stairs. But I am hoping that in a day or two that everything will be ok. I didn't do yoga today and don't plan on taking my walk tomorrow at work. Just resting during that time. The hardest part is that my kids basically can't touch me. They love to come up and hug my legs and they just can't do that right now. And trust me, I love their hugs as much as they love giving them. Bad knee also means stuck sitting around at home. Thank goodness I have a laptop. But also extra knitting time to get the stash knitted up.

In happy news, I am taking a little weekend trip on tax weekend for all of you in the U.S. I am going to Haulien to hike around Taroko Gorge for a day. The plan is to leave after work on Friday, spend Saturday in the gorge, and come back on Sunday. Hopefully I will have time Friday evening and Saturday evening to spend time in Haulien being touristy. I have lots of good things about Haulien and I am really looking forward to going.

And as for the Pimp, his standing as the Greatest Pimp Ever is under serious reconsideration at this point. I texted him Sunday while I was waiting to see the psychiatrist and was bored. If anyone could amuse me, it would be him. Instead, he deleted the message I sent him! What is up with that?!?!?!?!?!?! (Ok, he deleted other messages too, including one from his older brother) And then, the play has been postponed until April 21st and they are thinking about possibly adding more dates to it. So there are extra rehearsals and he is in charge of promotion for all of this. So he is even busier now than before. Dinner and movie for this week, postponed until further notice. It only took me a year add a couple of months of therapy to tell him how I feel, what the hell is a few more weeks anyway? I mean he is only leaving in three months. Fucking hell!!!! Alright, have to finish emailing the Pimp back and get to bed at a decent hour.

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03/14/2006

Yeah, yeah, yeah....

Once again, it has been like forever since I have posted. I swear, I have been busy though. You know- work, knitting, the Pimp, life, therapy, everything. First some knitting pictures. And as always, unblocked because I have no patience to wait for it to finish blocking before I post too much excitement from finishing a project. I finally finished Tubey this weekend. She is patiently drying right now. I used Rowan All Season Cotton for Tubey. While it is a lovely, lovely yarn, too much stretch for this pattern. And I should have knit a smaller size. I followed the suggestion of the cross back measurement. But I will knit this sweater again.

My Secret Pal has spoiled me again with a little gift. There was an iTunes gift card (already spent on Tracy Chapman), evil monkey gum, a happy monkey, and a beautiful card. It made my day. I received it at work and my kids kept trying to steal everything from me! Thank you SP.

This past weekend was amazing. Saturday was really busy. Had shopping and to meet with my private student. But several people from work and I went to see the Vagina Monologues. If you have never seen it, especially if you are a woman, GO SEE IT!!!!! It is amazing and empowering. I got to sit between the two most handsome men in the whole theater-the Pimp and another male co-worker. After wards we went to a restaurant/bar for some drinks. There were five of it and it was really nice. I am a pub girl and not a club girl. So sitting around with our drinks and just talking was fabulous for me. Then we went to this big club (Luxy) here in Taipei. There was suppose to be an invite only after show party there. I didn't have a ticket and neither did several other people. But we paid the regular entrance fee and were able to get in. I had a rum and coke. There I meet up with another co-worker. She and I danced and I got hit on by the Taiwanese boy (I have more arm hair then this guy) But it was actually nice. Then Sunday I finished knitting up Tubey. Tomorrow is therapy and I can't wait to talk about everything that has happened since my last appointment. 

06:25 Posted in Knitting , Life in Taiwan , me, me, and me | Permalink | Comments (3) | Email this

03/07/2006

Your mission

should you choose to accept it, it to take three different yarns and knit them into one wearable item. All three yarns must be used. You have until May 1st to complete your mission. Lisa gave me some leftover yarn she had with this mission, which I have accepted. There are three balls of a variegated brown dk weight yarn, one ball of Noro Silk Garden, and one ball of rainbow colored yarn. And I have been knitting as well. I used the wonderful, amazing kidsilk haze to knit up a cowl. I didn't plan ahead very well, so there is a seam which I have to hide when I wear it. But it is warm, soft, and beautiful.  And I have been working on my Tubey sweater as well. She is a fast knit actually. I am using Rowan All Season Cotton to knit it and I am beginning to feel that maybe it wasn't the best choice to use. But I think that if I just give it a quick turn in a dryer, that it will help. But here is progress so far. I should have her finished by Friday, the knitting part at least. So that this weekend I can block her and have her ready for her debut on March 24th. We are having a department dinner that night at a nice restaurant, so the perfect time to show off a new knit.

Now, to understand some of my denseness, you must understand that I haven't done any dating or anything since before I came to Taiwan. I was engaged before moving here, but things had gone bad long before and I didn't give the ring back until two weeks before I moved to Taiwan. Any regular readers here will know that I have had a crush on the Pimp for quite some time now. Then last Monday we went to dinner, had waffles, and wine. Now, I am so dense that it took me until Thursday and a couple of figurative slaps to view it as a date. (I am a little slow sometimes people, remember, you are laughing with me, not at me) It took my therapist and boss (who has known the Pimp for three years) before I took that view. It was for the best that I didn't think of it as a date when we went though, I was just me and not some nervous wreck. And during the date, we talked about everything and anything, it was great, really lovely. So hopefully on Sunday, there will a movie date(no chick flicks, please Pimp, so you think I am some kind of chick flick girl) , depending on the Pimp's schedule. He is in a play (that I am the costume whore for) that is will over with in about a month plus other stuff. Now, my boss, who has known the Pimp for three years tells me that there is a potential relationship developing. That he doesn't lead people on and that right now he really is just busy. My best friend and other friends are already going on about weddings in England, vacations in London, and that I will probably never move back to the U.S. And I would love to just completely believe all of this. But the worse case scenario part of my brain is locked in battle with the reasoning part of my brain. The reasoning part tells me that he is really busy, all the people are right and that there is a chance for the Pimp and I, just be patient and when the play is over, he will have more time. But the worse case scenario part is telling me that all of these people are just telling me what I want to hear, that he really doesn't like me as anything more than a friend. And my biggest fear, that the worse case scenario part is right and I don't want it to be. What I really need is just for Davi to come over here and knock some sense into me. I am telling you. So hopefully there is a movie in store on Sunday and that I don't end up making a nervous ass of myself. And that the reason part of my brain wins out. And I don't have an appointment with my therapist until next week. AAAHHH!!!

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03/01/2006

What the blank?!?!?!?!?!

Today was The Day for the GRE. I thought I was taking the whole thing tonight. NOT!!!! I only typed up the two essays and have to wait until JUNE 10TH to take the verbal and math parts. What the hell is up with that?????? I don't want to have to spend the next 13 weeks trying to remember what I have been studying so far. I am ready today people!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Actually, I am feeling really good day, the best in months actually. And I blame the Pimp for all of it. We went out on Monday night for dinner, wine, and conversation. We went to an Indian restaurant and then a wine bar and spent the whole night talking about stuff. I felt normal for the first time in a long time too. I didn't realize I was smiling until I came home and my roommates asked me why I was so happy. I said that "We went for dinner and wine tonight." So my roommate said that next time I am sick she will just buy me alcohol. For me it was all about the company and conversation. Yesterday was a national holiday, so had the entire day off from work. And I went to my therapist this morning and it was a really good time. There was a lot said, discussed, and thought about. So far, this week has been going very well.

Got a little drama yesterday in my email. My brother has gone and joined the Army (why not the Marine Corps, I don't know, I am just the sister) and leaves for basic on June 22nd. He wants to be an Airborne Ranger dude, I don't know. He is my only brother and the baby-11 years younger than me.

Even though I only had to take the two essays today, my brain is a little fried. So I am going to do some knitting on Tubey and then head to bed. Must be ready for 20 little ones tomorrow. And if I owe you an email, I am working on it, promise. Especially since I don't have to study quite so intensively for a while.

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02/15/2006

Holding out

I have been waiting to see if the Pimp would bring my yarn to work so I could post one big photo heavy post. But here it is Wednesday night and I am still waiting for my yarn from him. BUT he did bring chocolate today. But first, my latest Secret Pal package arrived this week. So much cool stuff. Not included in the picture is this book. I have actually hidden it so my students will quit playing with it. Excited 5 year olds can mean broken goods. But I also got these: Check out the monkey and banana stitch markers! Aren't they the greatest?!?!?!? They came inside a little red bag that is just too cute. And everything came inside a lovely tin. And the yarn- Paton Allure and Bernat Boa, are going to be a scarf, but still figuring it out in my head right now. Thank you Secret Pal!!! Next up, a finished Orangina, which has even been washed and blocked. I used a worsted weight yarn instead of what is called for in the pattern. I think it works for me.

 

 

 

And finally, a finished and unblocked Lelah tank. I changed the top section so it would fit me better and added straps. I think that once I block her though, I am going to have to figure out how to shorten the straps a little. And hopefully blocking will help smooth out the top edge as well. Not sure about the ribbon part though. I would like to change it, but this is all I could come up with until I have time to head to the big fabric market in a couple of weeks. 

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02/09/2006

OMG!!!!!

I finally saw a psychiatrist on Monday, I won't bore with the details of all of that. But the psychiatrist diagnosed me with severe depression and I am on Prozac. Started taking it on Tuesday morning and the side effects are starting to kick in full force today. I knew there would be side effects, but I have a sinus infection as well today. Which may have been brought on by the drying effect of the Prozac. So I am going to be a party pooper and go to bed early tonight. I have finished Orangina up and start on Lelah, but as of today, no knitting what so ever. Hoping to feel better tomorrow so I can work on Lelah and block Orangina. And then I will post pictures.

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02/02/2006

All you need are pictures.......

and a crazy girl who is too lazy to type anything out. So enjoy the baby booties complete with buttons, one angora bootie (pattern from Last Minute Gifts) and the beginnings of Orangina from Glampyre.  And I got my hair done today as well. It is now a blonde thing going on. I got my hair done instead of going to the psychiatrist to get anti-depressant meds. But I will be going tomorrow morning to do that. Did meet with my therapist today though and have to go back next week. But pics of the new hair, apologies for the crap pictures. Not good at the self-portrait thing.

03:09 Posted in Knitting , Life in Taiwan , me, me, and me | Permalink | Comments (3) | Email this

01/24/2006

First the good news

Which is that I got my first secret pal package in the mail today. It made my day today. Let me tell you. There is some Knit Picks sock yarn, Rowan Kidsilk Haze (So beautiful and soft. I am going to spend some time finding a pattern for it), a lunch box tin with snowflakes on it, a copy of Knit Simple magazine (there are already half a dozen patterns I love in there), several paper snowflakes, and my first Evil Monkey of the Month club (which I am a proud and honored to be part of) surprise. The book Five Little Monkey Jumping on the Bed (my students love you too Secret Pal) and a Barrel of Monkeys (I will not be sharing those just yet). The tin had lovely, lovely cookies in it. And while they survived the trip to me, they did not survive the day. THANK YOU!!!! THANK YOU!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!! Secret Pal, everything you sent is absolutely perfect.

And now for the not good news. I was planning on going to Haulien and Taroko Gorge in two weeks. But I don't think I am going to be able to go until the next break from work, which will be this summer. First of all, this weekend is Chinese New Year and I am a little late in making reservations. Second, rainy season. Me with a pack on my back in a gorge in the rain is not happiness. And the biggest reason, last Thursday I went to see a counselor here in Taipei. I had spent three days crying for no reason. I have depression, I am depressed. Now I know there is a reason why I am feeling the way I do. Some days are better than others. Last Thursday after talking and crying I felt the best I had in many months. Friday afternoon, the feeling of something sitting on my chest, my shoulders being hunched up to my ears, and a general feeling of "I don't give a flying fuck (sorry Dad) about anything" started to come back. There is a line in the David Gray song, "The One I Love," that is "I am leaking life faster than I am leaking blood." I completely understand how that feels. My life is going by and I am sitting here going "Don't care, so what." During the really bad days of not caring, I don't care about work, my students, or even if I step in front of a bus. I had forgotten what it was to not feel like that. I go back on the 2nd to talk with my counselor. And I think I am going to ask about some medication for me. I just can't take this feeling of not caring any more, especially when it affects the 20 little ones I am responsible for. What I have been told by people and have read, that sometimes, there are some side effect while your body gets use to the medicine. And I don't want to be in a gorge in the rain with a pack on my back trying to deal with these possible side effects. I was planning on typing this part of my post tonight, but didn't realize I would get my ultra cool and wonderful secret pal package today. I feel the need to talk about my depression and by posting, people who don't want to read or are tired of hearing me complain can skip this part. So the trip to Haulien is postponed until this summer. By then the rainy season will be over too.

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01/12/2006

Procrastination and insomnia

This past week has been a blur. It is end of the semester here at work (Taiwan put a cap of a max. of a 100 days per semester) and the paperwork just seems to grow no matter what I do. I have stuff I should be typing up right now. But not me, super procrastinator. I am blogging away and answering emails. But it hasn't helped that I haven't slept in a week either. Since I not the emotional eater that I use to be, I am now an emotional sleeper. Not happy news is being sent and just stress of work and life in general. But because of the lack of sleep thing, I have gotten two hats knitted in 9 days. One hat is just simple stockinette and the other is Shedir from Knitty.com. All those cables took a while. Both are for the Pimp. He asked for Shedir and the other one is a thank you gift for all the yarn he is going to bring back. All his parents have told him is that there are three boxes waiting. But he has sewing for me to take care of as well. Lucky that he has his own personal whore for all of this.

The past few days have put the world kind of in perspective for me. It really is a small world. I went to high school with one of the guys killed in the mine explosion in W.V. I haven't talked to him in over 10 years, so it isn't overwhelming grief, just kind of a Wow! six degrees of separation thing. We went to school with his first wife, she was three (or two) years behind us. I don't know anything about his current wife or his kids. But he and I were in at least one class together every year and we belonged to some of the same clubs. It just feels strange. With all the billions of people in the world and I am in Taiwan, what can I say other than it is a small world.

 Time to get off the net. Have work stuff to finish typing, GRE studying to do, and my sister's birthday knitting to finish up. And hopefully tonight I will get some sleep.  

Edited note: The whole point of this post, see procrastinating again, is to say HI! to my secret pal. My questionnaire is a few post away. To lazy and busy to put it as a link in the sidebar. Tomorrow, I promise. :)

06:10 Posted in Knitting , Life in Taiwan , me, me, and me | Permalink | Comments (1) | Email this

01/10/2006

One down....

Ok, on the list of things to do this year that are NOT resolutions, I have finally registered to take the GRE. I will be taking it on Weds. March 1, 2006 at 6:30pm here in Taipei. So now that I have a date, I have to get off my lazy arse and STUDY, STUDY, and STUDY (in other words put the knitting down and no one will get hurt). So soon, there will be two down. Keeping my fingers crossed that everything will work out. I am going to start carrying my GRE study book to school. I need to find a way to copy the vocab so I can study as I am walking.

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01/07/2006

Hi, my name is Erin and........

I live in my happy bubble of delusion and am also trying to function on 4 hours of drunk sleep. So excuse any horrible spelling and grammar errors. But first, knitting news. I finished the baby knitting for Miyuki and mailed it off yesterday. No pictures until I know she had gotten it, don't want to spoil the surprise. But I did remember to take pictures before I mailed it off.

Life has been a little quiet lately and I have been waiting for the next curve ball to come. And I think it has. You must first understand the communication dynamics in my family. Maybe it has something to do with us being spread all over the world. When something important happens, communication is never direct, there always has to be a messenger or two. Like when my sister Judith got married, she never told me, I found out when I called one day. Then I happen to mention to my sister Elizabeth one day when talk to her, but she didn't know either. Apparently, my sister Joanna had a seizure, don't know when though. I found out when I was told by my Dad. What I should do is call and talk to my sister about this. But I know that if I call, I will get pissed off about not being emailed about it. Just because I leave on the other side of the world....................fucking hell.

Ok, now on to last night. It started with me coming home and starting the night with a rum and coke. Last night was the Pimp's birthday. He invited some people over for food, wine and some Nighty Night episodes. I had a lovely time, but I still lack those ever so important small talk/conversation skills. Then we all headed over to KTV. Drunk, groping lady who use to work at the school is madly ___ with the Pimp. So the place we were at closed and we went to another KTV place. Mind you, the wine flowed with gusto, there was some whiskey involved (not a whiskey girl I learned) and more wine. The twist, I have a crush on the Pimp. This is the first interest I've had in a guy since I broke my engagement off 2.5 years ago. It took me a long time to untangle from that. And I feel like a 14 year old, with a crush. Even with all the alcohol, I didn't do or say anything stupid. But, in the end, I shared a cab with drunk, groping lady, because I am just that nice. Now, this is probably as close to telling the Pimp how I feel. I work with him and that is just bad karma all around. Two, he is getting ready to go back home this summer to England to study for six years, or some obscenely long time. And I will be going back to the U.S. And if living in Taiwan has taught me anything, it is that I need to be closer to my friends and family. Three, I am 95% sure I am not the type of girl he likes. I don't need self-induced rejection at this point in my life. So with those factors, I don't say anything to him, remain friends, and knit and fix his clothes for him. And in the end, it is probably for the best. That is what I keep telling myself. Delusion, my excuse for being a gutless wonder. Oh, well, to the yarn store in a little while.

00:57 Posted in Family , Knitting , me, me, and me | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this

01/01/2006

Happy New Year....

I am generally not a resolutions kind of person. But reading blogs, lots of people are making lists and resolutions. I am definitely a joiner, so I am going to list some things I would like to to, not necessarily this year, but in my life. And this is more interesting than me complaining, once again, about a holiday that I have sort of missed out on again.

1. Take the GRE. I need to do this soon (like in the next two months), which means I need to get off my ass and study more. I have a study book and I have been studying a little. But it needs to be consistent. And since spending my days with 5 year olds, I need to brush up on vocabulary and math. When you teach bigger, smaller, what comes next, and sharing for math, the more advanced ideas and concepts get lost in the back some where.

2. Apply (and be accepted) to grad school in a reading education program. I know, for the most part, where I want to apply. Just a matter of taking the GRE and then applying. Such a process. And involves me getting off my ass and doing something.

3. Learn French and brush up on my Spanish. It has been many years since I have learned Spanish and I would love to learn French (kiss my butt GWB). I didn't take French in high school because all the "popular" kids and the cheerleaders did. God forbid I would choose to take a language class with them. And the French teacher was the class sponsor for my graduating class and she knew I was a total slacker in the fund-raising, prom decoration committee, and other stuff part of high school. But this might take a little while.

4. Practice yoga at home at least 3 days a week. When I get my Chinese New Years bonus, I have picked out two yoga books I want to buy. And the yoga instructor at work can help me out until she leaves to move back to her home country.

5. Tone up. 2005 was the year I lost 24 kgs. So this year is the year to get rid of the fat pockets I still have and tone up. Change my focus from losing weight to losing inches. Get down to a size 10 or 12 in U.S. ladies size jeans (currently a 14). So continue with the walking, swimming, and yoga. And add/change my diet and exercise routine as needed.

6. Learn to be a bit more outgoing and practice my small talk/random conversation skills with real people. I am a wallflower. And with THE TRIP in the future, I don't want to waste opportunities of learning about the country, meeting people, and life in general because I am too shy and to cautious to talk to people. Now understand, not completely throw caution to the wind, but at least be able to strike up a conversation with someone and be interesting for more than a minute.

7. Answer emails, and blog comments, in a timely fashion. I love getting emails and comments, but I have to send emails and leave comments if I want people to email and leave comments for me. If I would spend less time playing around on the internet (spending 45 minutes googling for "intarsia in the round" is not the best use of my time) and more time answering emails and posting comments, it would be better.

8. Learn, figure out how, to do intarsia in the round. I am making another Hourglass Sweater. The Pimp is drawing up a tribal design for me I can knit in it. I hate seaming and the Hourglass Sweater pattern is perfect as it is. So in order to knit it up with the design, I have to learn intarsia in the round. I say intarsia because I will only be using two colors and of the design (Which I will be posting as soon as it is done).

9. Finish up all the knitting projects I currently have and find ways to use the scrap yarn I have. I don't think that will be too difficult. But I need to add that I can't buy new yarn, especially for myself, until I have used up the yarn I have bought already. There are 18 balls of yarn in England waiting to be delivered by the Pimp in February. The exceptions to this, Secret Pal 7 (which I am totally excited about), baby knitting, gift knitting, and a thank you gift for the Pimp for the yarn delivery and sweater design help. Outside of baby knitting, I don't think there will be a lot of gift knitting for a while.

10. Do more hiking in Taiwan. I have a map with information about hiking/walking trails in Taiwan. Not only where these trails are, but what MRT train and/or bus to take to get there. Outside of Taipei, Taiwan is a beautiful country and I need to get out into the green areas of the country more.

Now this list is subject to change at any time. I reserve the right to change my mind about these at any time for any reason. Yes Dad, I am just like that too.

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